Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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