you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
