At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i think i have two assholes
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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