I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
