he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
