No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
