i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
i now understand why vodka
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Randomize