UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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