another moral hangover. fuck.
i would punch a child for taco bell
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
