problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
