I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
