so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
