You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
