i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize