Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I didn't notice because vodka
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
