did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize