i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
