its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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