youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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