I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
