I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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