Cold hands, warm shart.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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