My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
