well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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