no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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