I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
