Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
