is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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