She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
