Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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