Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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