No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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