just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize