I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
