I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
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