Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize