I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I bet he comes in French.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
if only i could text you this smell
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
