I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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