Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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