dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
