"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize