You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
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