So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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