Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize