bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
