Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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