I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Randomize
