i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
It was confusing and full of hummus
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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