I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
