Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
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