is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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