Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
