Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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